One time I was supposed to be on David Letterman, and it was the same night that Madonna was on, and Madonna went long so I got bumped. But I got to eat cantaloupe backstage so it was still cool. It was already cut up into bite-size pieces. I got paid $900 to eat cantaloupe. That's fucking unprecedented! I rubbed that shit in my dad's face. I said, 'You've never been paid that much to eat cantaloupe. You always have to do it for free!'